7 Signs A Marriage Won't Last, According To Sex Therapists

Sex isn’t everything in a marriage, for most people, a healthy, regular life matters quite a bit. Sex therapists can vouch for that. they share seven issues that can r relationship if left unaddressed.

1. The couple no longer has sex.

Surprisingly, you can be in a sexle marriage and still have sex. Thera define a sexless relationship as on which the couple are physically into less than 10 times a year . In most sexless marriages, the abs of any physical connection divides couples, said Sari Cooper , certified therapist and host of the web show Esteem. “Partners end up alienating each o on a very deep, very primal and sometimes emotional level,” she to The Huffington Post. “Very freque the couple not only avoids sex, but discussion of the problem itself. T only leads to a further sense of iso and loneliness for the partners.” When couples in sexless marriage come to Cooper’s office, she helps t broach the discussion without plac the blame on one person in partic “The sexually frustrated partner n to ‘break the ice’ and let their S.O. how much they miss them,” she sa “That’s a much better approach th arguing or blaming the other.”

2. One partner doesn’t feel sexually desired.

Feeling wanted and desired is a hu turn-on, especially for women. As researcher Marta Meana once put an interview with the New York Ti for women, “being desired is the orgasm.” When a partner fails to reassure a woman of her desirabil their sex life naturally takes a hit, Laurie Watson, a sex therapist and co-host of the sex advice podcast Foreplay. “Resolving the issue is all about exploring expectations. You have t consider how intimate couple time lead to better and more sex,” she s “It also doesn’t hurt to make sure partner is getting good sex with pl of orgasms so she’ll want to do it.”

3. There’s a breakdown in intimacy a affair.

Broken trust after an affair can be hard thing to mend and your sex life will take even longer to restore, Co said.

“It takes a lot of effort and work b unfaithful partner to re-establish t Meanwhile, the betrayed partner n to better understand what led to the affair,” she said. “Often, the couple needs to create a new sexual control sorts, that addresses the needs that not being met or hidden. If the unfaithful partner continues have contact with the other man o woman in secret, it may be impose to repair the emotional and erotic Cooper said.

4. There’s no physical attraction.

In long-term couples, waning sexu attraction can do a number on the relationship, said Moushumi Ghos

sex therapist and author of Classic Positions Reinvented. “Sometimes, it’s a matter of one so letting themselves go,” she said. “Obviously, life happens and the d stressors of work, marriage, and h a family can take its toll, but people are no longer physically attracted t their partner sometimes take it as that their partner has given up on themselves and their relationship.

5. Physical barriers to sex become a scapegoat.

There are plenty of physical and related reasons couples stop having from premature ejaculation and er dysfunction, to pain during intercourse for women. These problems should be address with a doctor, but there’s usually s emotional work that needs to be d by the couple as well, said Celeste Hirschman, a sex therapist and theauthor of Making Love Real: The Intelligent Couple’s Guide to Lastin Intimacy and Passion. “When these functional problems up being blamed for all the sexual problems ― and sometimes, problems in the relationship in general ― it blocks the couples ability to discus sexual and emotional needs,” she s “Couples need to see beyond the dysfunction and look at the dynam that’s been created around it, like of being undesirable or blaming the other person for everything.”

6. Sexual interests and fetishes are a off.

We all want different things: Whe your partner opens up about how t want rough sex or to role play, the worse thing you can do is disregar laugh it off, said Ava Cadell , a sex therapist and author of NeuroLove The Power to Mindful Love & Sex.

“I tell my clients that everything is negotiable, even in the bedroom,” said. “If one partner enjoys BDSM the other is not that into it but wan something else, I recommend they share three romantic fantasies and make one a reality for the other.” From there, continue to share you sexual fantasies and boundaries w any fear of judgement or rejection, Cadell said.

7. There’s a desire discrepancy.

Many couples suffer from a “desir discrepancy,” a situation where on partner wants sex more than the o This poses a big problem for most couples because the lower-desire s holds all the control of the couple’s life, whether they realize it or not. Eventually, the higher-desire spou grows resentful, said Megan Flemi psychologist and sex therapist in N York City. “Sex mismatches are at risk for aff and divorce if not addressed, since more sexual partner often can’t im living the rest of their lives this wa she told HuffPost. “After all, they committed to a marriage, not a life abstinence" Don’t wait until your partner is at wits’ end before addressing the issue" “The good news is that reasons for desire are complex but treatable,” Fleming said.